This post was inspired by The Godly Dating 101 Pod, which spoke about the somewhat blurred lines between confirmation and your feelings. This applies to relationships and pretty much any area of your life.
…Being in love
Let me start with a convo I had with a friend a while back. They mentioned that in their last serious relationship, they felt like they were ‘in a movie’, it was ‘perfectly orchestrated by God’, ‘divinely coincidental’ and ‘so convenient’. Say swear this is how it feels to be in love.
However, they soon began to feel guilty as they knew this relationship wasn’t what God wanted for them and that God wasn’t in their relationship.
You know sometimes when you really want something, before you even ask God for confirmation or the stamp of approval you have already made up your mind about the situation. So what’s the point of even asking God when you already know in your heart what you want to do? On the pod, they said ‘when your mind is made up everything looks like confirmation’. This is scary as this is how you could miss what God actually has for you as you’re blinded by what you want.
Are you really hearing from God? Or are you hearing your feelings?
The heart is too deceitful
that the heart is deceitful above all things (Jeremiah 17:9). So more time I can’t even trust myself as a person may think their own ways are right, but the LORD weighs and examines the heart (Proverbs 21:2).God is the only one who truly knows you. He even knows you better than you know yourself.
Why is hearing from God so hard sometimes? Why is it so hard to actually listen to what He says?
I’ve said it before and I think feelings are unreliable (17- Valentine’s day special and reminiscing).
I’ve been telling myself that it’s God’s will over my feelings and emotions regardless of what that may look like. Ngl, that is a hard statement to say, but I recognise God’s sovereignty over my life and His will will always come to pass. I might as well jump on the train and listen and do what He says. Goodbye feelings hello obedience.
Your feelings could distract you from hearing from God clearly. This is why it’s so importante to get your mind and heart aligned with the Spirit. As my home-girl Joyce Meyer (JM) said, ‘don’t make decisions based on your thoughts and feelings – check with your spirit’. Go to God in prayer. Read the Bible and actually listen to Him. Don’t just ask then run away.
But pause.
Be still.
Linger in His presence.
Be patient.
Impatience while waiting on God
My home-girl JM also taught me that ‘impatience is the fruit of pride’. Instead of waiting on the LORD, you feel like you deserve whatever you’re meant to be waiting for now. Excuse yourself? Don’t do that. Don’t try and rush the creator of the universe as if He doesn’t know what He’s doing.
Have you read in the Bible what happened to Abraham and Sarah when they tried to get ahead of God because they couldn’t see Him fulfilling His promise to them? Instead of Isaac being the firstborn son, Ishmael was born first as Sarah allowed her husband to impregnate her servant Hagar. This led to unnecessary pasa. Yet through all of this God’s Word still came to pass.
How do I know if I’m hearing from God?
One could ask: how do I know if I got confirmation from God? Me personally, I couldn’t tell you. That’s between you and God boo. But I would say as mentioned previously, just ask God and be completely honest about how you feel about the situation. Read the Bible to see if it aligns with God’s Word and seek spiritual accountability if you have one. But even then, sometimes it’s still scary because you don’t know if you’re doing the right thing.
It might even be a thing whereby you’re like to God, ‘I don’t know what to do, but my eyes are on you’ (2 Chronicles 20:12). Then you just need to step out in faith, trusting God that you made the right decision. Of course it’s necessary to wait on God though. I love it when the Psalmist said, ‘I wait for the LORD, my whole being waits, and in His word I put my hope’ – Psalm 130:5. But you shouldn’t use waiting on God as an excuse to not do what you know has already been confirmed to you.
On the other hand, you might know the confirmation and you know what you need to do, but you keep asking God to try and get Him to change His mind. I’m sorry but God is not a human that He should lie, or that He should change his mind. If He makes a promise he will fulfil it (Numbers 23:19).
Resources
Song
‘Be the Lord of my emotions, set me free from selfish motives, search me till there’s nothing hidden’ – a prayer still:
Podcast
In this pod they also posed questions to ask yourself if you’re feeling stuck between confirmation vs your feelings:
- Is it leading me closer to Jesus?
- What does my spiritual accountability say?
- Do you have peace about what you’re about to do?
- Is your response rooted in impatience or rebellion?