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So I just finished listening to an episode of the ‘To My Sisters’ podcast about being ‘broken from the womb’, surviving childhood trauma and all that fun stuff that people don’t like to talk about.
They mentioned how some people don’t deal with their trauma but instead develop coping mechanisms…
Okay.
Interesting.
And triggering.
Coping mechanisms
One could say that developing coping mechanisms could be beneficial, as you are essentially finding ways to handle and deal with your trauma. However, what if said coping mechanism isn’t healthy..
The scripture in Proverbs 28:13 comes to mind: “whoever conceals their sins does not prosper, but the one who confesses and renounces them finds mercy”.
Okay, so I’m not calling trauma a sin. But I think the principle mentioned in the scripture above can be applied to trauma. The more I speak to people (whoever knows me will know that I love asking questions and really getting to know people – I should probably write about why I think I do that, but that’s for another day) – the more I realise that so many of us are dealing with trauma and PTSD that we don’t talk about. Or don’t address.
Let me just quickly mention something about myself: I’m a serial listener. I aim to listen so intently that I hear things you don’t say (shout out to my mentor Sam Lawrence for teaching me this). Whenever I’m having a conversation and something deep or a traumatic experience is briefly mentioned, best believe I will remember, pray about it and bring it up again at an appropriate time, if necessary.
You can’t speak to me and expect me to not notice how swiftly the conversation changes when grief, pain or insecurity is mentioned. I’m just weird like that. Anyway back to what I was saying before.
Why are we afraid of healing?
How can you expect to heal from something if you don’t acknowledge or talk about it?
Is it the fear of actually addressing the problem? Getting down to the roots, the nitty gritty that makes people scared… yes, I do believe it is.
Why don’t we like to admit to ourselves how hurt we really are?
Are you defined by your childhood trauma?
In the podcast episode they also spoke about thinking about what defines you.
What events do you remember from your childhood and think about why you remember them.
If you were to write a book about your life, what key events would you include and how would you portray yourself?
Such thought provoking questions. I love listening to intelligent people – Black girls in particular.
Ngl, this is a heavy topic that I will probably go deeper into another day. This post was barely scratching the surface, it was more so a summary of the podcast.
Hope you enjoyed it xxx
