#12 – Surviving 2019: Changing my perspective on pain

As a person who has struggled with suicidal thoughts and dark periods in her life (I really don’t like the word depression I feel like it’s thrown around so loosely), my heart actually breaks for people who also go through the same thing but don’t believe in God.

 Like, where do you even go from there?

Changing my perspective of pain

Changing my perspective on my pain 

For me personally, God helps me to make sense of it all. To see that there is purpose in the pain. That weeping may stay for the night, but rejoicing comes in the morningPsalm 30:5. God reminds me that there is so much more, as in, so much more than what I’m currently facing right now. Even when I can’t see it. God helps me with changing my perspective of my pain.

One scripture that really helped me and to this day (till this day) is still my screensaver on my phone, ‘He will wipe away every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death, sadness, crying, or pain. All the old ways are goneRevelation 21:4. You see this scripture yeah, it reminds me that this life on earth is actually temporary. Let me not even talk too much about how we all act as if we will live forever on this earth and will take all our possessions with us. But we’re all going to die someday…what will be waiting for you when you die though?

My heart breaks for people who commit suicide or consider suicide because they don’t see their pain ending.

They just want the pain to stop.

The emptiness.

The numbing.

The hollowness.

They just want it all to go away.

Passing on generational pain

I’m such an advocate for talking about pain and trauma (blog 3 about trauma) because we actually all go through it, but don’t talk about it enough.

Changing my perspective of my pain

Even in laughter the heart may acheProverbs 14:13, this was deffo my life for a long period. I know many can relate as well. To the world you seem happy, but deep down you know you’re not okay. This helped in changing my perspective of pain as the pain may not always be visible.

But in wanting to help people so they don’t have to go through the feelings I went through, I always have to remind myself that I am no one’s saviour. Jesus is. Periodt.

If you didn’t know already, ignoring a problem won’t make it disappear. 

How do you expect to heal from things if you don’t even acknowledge them or address them? 

Do you want your children and their children to deal with the issues you refused to deal with?

Do you want to pass on generational pain instead of generational wealth? When I say wealth, I’m not just referring to money as I believe wealth is also a mindset. 

Sometimes you don’t even realise how much your childhood has affected you. This is where self-awareness comes in and even getting therapy (but not everyone has the dinero for that still).

Changing my perspective of my identity

So following on from blog numero 9: why did I have ‌these negative feelings you may ask? Of inadequacy, insecurity, loneliness and all them other synonyms. I believe the major factors were comparison todo el mundo sabe que comparison is the thief of joy – pero not me at the time).

I also allowed life experiences to define me, labels placed on me by others and just lies from the devil. All these external factors defined who I was, so as a result I didn’t know who I really was anymore.

When I started reading the Bible plan Living Changed: Identity my eyes opened to the warped view I had of myself.

I learned that my identity is in who God says I am. My identity is not based on the labels others gave me.

Let’s take it back to the beginning: God created mankind in his own imageGenesis 1:27. Okay. So. Me. Yo. I am created in the image of God. The One who created the entire universe!!

I am his handiwork – Ephesians 2:10. A whole me?

He knit me together in my mother’s womb – Psalm 139:13.

I can actually go on and on.

God showed me how precious I am, that I matter. I am wanted. I am valued and shouldn’t think any less of myself. 

Therefore, I have no choice but to put my identity in what God says and not in what the world says about me.


Resources

Song

I thank God for this song because I found it at the right time. The lyrics literally explained how I was feeling:

Steffany Gretzinger – Letting Go

Sermon

This sermon by Pastor Mike Todd is all about family ties and dysfunctional families. It really changed how I view my family and the importance of dealing with family issues.

Ps Mike Todd – Family Ties (All Strings Attached – Part 2)

Podcast

Redefining Wealth by Patrice Washington is one of my favourite podcasts where she literally redefines wealth as she believes it’s more than just money and material possessions. In this episode, she speaks about the six pillars her podcast is built on and how they all contribute to wealth:

Redefining Wealth – Pillar 6 Money: It’s Just the Byproduct


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1 Comment

  1. Anonymous
    July 19, 2022 / 9:04 am

    Can I just say what a comfort to find somebody who truly understands what theyre talking about on the net. You certainly understand how to bring a problem to light and make it important. A lot more people really need to look at this and understand this side of the story. I cant believe youre not more popular because you definitely possess the gift.

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